Thursday, March 17, 2011

Awards Season, Part One

It's that time of the year. As the college basketball regular season has ended and the postseason is gearing up, the individual hardaware is being handed out. All-Conference selections have been made, and national awards like the Wooden and the Naismith are still pending. Here at the Says Things blog, we're starting our own tradition by handing out some alternative awards to honor those who may have been overlooked by the various media and coaches that dole out the usual honors.

Bob Wade Achivements in Coaching Award - Sidney Lowe, NCSU

In the end it was a tough choice between Lowe and Jeff Bzdzelik of Wake Forest. Lowe gets the nod because whereas Wake Forest was historically terrible, at least they were expected to be awful having lost so much from last year's tournament team. This - in year 5 of the Sidney Lowe era - was supposed to be the turning point, fueled by a great recruiting class. Despite that, it ended in just another 5-11 season. [Ed. Note: Sidney Lowe has since resigned as NCSU head coach]

Exree Hipp Senior of the Year Award - Cliff Tucker, Maryland

Named in honor of the Maryland wing (Hipp's scoring average dropped from 13.6 to a four year low of 6.8 in his senior year), this award honors another Maryland player. Tucker averaged 11.7 points a night over the team's first twenty games, but finished out the season scoring just 5.4 over the final 11 as as the team lost 6 of those games.

John Calipari Award for Audacious Cheating - Bruce Pearl, Tennessee

It's bad enough to cheat. It's even worse when you cheat despite having gained notoriety in the basketball world as a snitch (whistleblower if you so choose). It takes things to another level when you cheat AGAIN four days after giving a tearful apology in re: your prior transgression. Even Cal shakes his greasy head at the balls on his cheating SEC East brother.

John Goldsberry Random Turd Award - Rion Brown, Miami

You may remember Goldsberry from the Terps' first round victory over UNC-Wilmington in 2003 a.k.a The Drew Nicholas Shot Game. Goldsberry sank 8 of 8 threes despite averaging just 5 points a night that season. Brown came into the Canes game with the Terps averaging less than 4 per game having not scored in double figures since a November tilt against McNeese State. Naturally, Brown would score 19 on 6-7 shooting from deep on a night where Gary Williams inexplicably zoned Miami well past the point of futility.

Jim Valvano Never Give Up Award - Wake Forest Basketball

It's one thing to be bad, but this bad? Wake Forest lost 15 times in an ACC that was realtively weak by its own standards, and as if that weren't bad enough, it lost 14 of those games by 14 points or more. The season was punctuated by going 0-4 with an average margin of defeat of 26.8 ppg against the next two worst teams in the conference (Georgia Tech and NC State).

AC Green Abstinence Award - Brigham Young University

I suppose I can respect sticking to your principles. On the other hand, as a sports fan, it's insane to suspend your third leading scorer for having some consensual extracurriculars with a coed, particularly when you're a mid-major with the best player in the country and a legit shot at a Final Four or more. Tough lost, mormons.

Schadenfraude Award - Korie Lucious, Michigan State

Korie you really screwed me over good with that fucking buzzer beater. But now that you've found yourself charged with a DUI, kicked off the Michigan State team, and transferring to Iowa State, I can't help but smile even though that makes me an abysmal, soulless person. Godspeed playing in the cornfields.

Tyler Hansbrough "Player of the Year Award" - Ben Hansbrough, Notre Dame

Remember back in 2008 when PSYCHO T won the Wooden Award (among several other national POY honors) over Kevin Love and Michael Beasley, despite either of the two being clearly better by most metrics? Somehow his brother may have one-upped him this year by winning the Big East Player of the Year Award. Not only did the younger Hansbrough beat out Marshon Brooks (24.6 ppg, second nationally) of Providence, he beat clear favorite Kemba Walker of UConn (8 games of 30+ points). Seriously? That's worse awards voting than when the Big East decided to name a ten man "All Conference" team because of the outlandish size of the conference.

Please stay tuned for the Postseason Awards, coming to this blog early next month!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

what about the skip prosser "no heart" award?